random thoughts: coping and facing inner evils

I am someone who might be called a "hermit" by others, i like and need to spend time alone, thinking about life and reflecting on my deeds. As such, I am highly sensitive to my thoughts and emotions.

I am no angel, there are many times, I have selfish thoughts and negative emotions. The best way of dealing with them is never to brush them aside or tried to suppressed it with guilt, guilt itself is a strong emotion and should not be any better than envy, fear or anger. Face it, know why and how that emotion came about, accept that emotion, be kind to yourself and give yourself time to internalize it and reach internal equilibrium too. No particular one emotion is better than another, all should come and go like the passing of clouds, if you wish "joy" with stay with you longer, it will followed very quickly by "disappointment".

Once you allow yourself time, you can now take time as a measurement of the intensity of the emotion, if it come and go in a day, we should let it go just like a day in our lifetime is a drop of water in a river. If you cannot get over it in a day, and the frequency of that emotion creeping up to you is still bothering you, you might need to talk to someone, or go somewhere to chill.

Recently, there is news of personnel movement in my workplace, and there are plenty of rumors. I felt apprehensiveness, jealousy, and anxiety. It didn't help that emotions created some unkind thoughts too. I let it be, and after a day, its still on my mind, but I know the frequency of negative emotions and thoughts are reducing, so I am quite sure it will die a natural death, nonetheless I talk to a few people about it, and I am perfectly fine now, the equilibrium balance state of mind, no joy, just peace, and peace bring sustained happiness. 

I tried suppressing or allow myself to be consumed by guilt, it took much longer to recover.

Stock investing is such a good practice ground for coping with one emotions. So, if I make a mistake in investment, I might felt anger or guilt (money could be better spent elsewhere), I might get roller coaster feelings in seeing my investment values plunging or rocketing.  The faster we come to terms with it, the lesser the chance of us throwing good money after bad or getting carried away and think we are as good as Warren Buffet. Investing should be enjoyable, you enjoy making judgement call, and getting your long term goal fulfilled (mine is financial stability and comfortable retirement), it should be stressful or taking away the pleasures in life. It should not generate intense emotions too.

(Anyway, if you have not noticed, any posts with the headings "random thoughts" are not related to investment, if you are not interested, skip the post.. haha)