Looking back, I am already in my "prime" 40s. For the underachievers in their FI journey, like me, looking back in my 20 odd years of working life, could life be different, due to choices we made. U bet? But I had no regrets.
1) Late 20s Starting work
I married young. When I started work for 2 years, I got.married. I bought resale flat because I didn't want to wait for a unit. I got a car before 30. We gotten a baby just when I turned 30.
Expenses were high. Savings were low to nothing. about 20 percent of my income went to my parents allowance.
I got have give the car a miss, wait for BTO, but again, I am glad I provided convenience and comfort to my familiy. Yes, there were some quarrels over money, but those were short, and after we are aware of various concerns, we become more understanding of each other.
Investment is rather useless in terms of absolute sum, but it is still a good learning experience. Those were the years I bought a lot of S chips thinking they are dirt cheap.
30s prime of my career.
My career was quite smooth sailing. My promotion came reasonably fast. I climb the ladder and my pay increase. As my child grow older, expenses went down. Before they go P1, childcare services is like Uni education.
The shock came when I realised how ill prepared I was dealing with my parents caregiving cost.
I remember surrendering a policy to raise cash. All went well. But I remembered losing sleep over money, as the cost of respite nurse alone can add up to thousands in a month.
This is also the age when your peers upgrade to private property or gotten their 2nd property investment.
On hindsight, borrowing heavily then is the right thing to do, interest is dirt cheap and property price raise more than offset it. I didn't have the balls to do it, and I still don't. I know if one of the direction ( price increase) or ( interest increase ) move against me, I might be in trouble. I also wanted buffer to care for my aged parents then.
There were again some disagreemts during this period of time.
Recent years.
My wife and I see eye to eye more often. Maybe because she finally experince first hand how good it is to be without burden of property. When she is feeling distressed in work. I said, quit. Rest and find something else to do. 我养你。we are not hard up for money.
Can we have done things differently? U bet. Maybe I can do some freelance to earn more, to pay for that second property ?
Maybe we can cut down on all those dinning out. I might then be within striking distance of FI in another 10 years perhaps ?
But I bear no I'll feelings. It my choice there and then. At least, I feed my family and is of no burden to others. (Yet?)
The investment journey, however, is really a worthy one to make. Although without size, it is a joke.
But, I see the world in another perspective from business owners. It is fun, when u go shopping like scuttbutting. Also it is good zen training. How u control fear of missing out and question whether u are fearful or greedy?
U become cynical, in a good way, and also I know quite a few bloggers that turn out to be good friends. (Although we might not meet up often or at all)
It made u appreciate the impermanence of life, since market goes in cycles and whipsaws and profits and loss change everyday.
It made me, readily accept a good deal, without having to satisfied myself that it is the best deal. (u can't buy at market bottom and sell at top)
So, whatever the outcome, whatever the circumstances, keep moving.