Wednesday, February 25, 2015

Random thoughts: Getting thick skinned as I age/ grow

In the last 6 months, I felt I have become different. Neither good nor bad, but after facing inner demons for a while, I realized many  things that would have upset me or bother me, begin to come and go more easily. I think I have gotten a bit thick skinned

Remember I blog about organizing the CNY concert. I thought it was a job well done, but my staff think otherwise and believed that there were many hiccups. Well, I have to tell them we can planned until the cow come back and things will still go wrong, but generally, I think we did ok. LOL

I made a mistake and had a clash of committements. I told my Ps about it and got a "saying" i usually would feel quite bad, incompetent etc. for quite a while, this time round, it last just 5 min and I laughed it off.

I am quite a henpecked husband, but now, I quite straight forwardly "tell my wife off" in a gentle manner without feeling anxiety LOL. And she didn't even mind. 

I told my staff to leave earlier in a useless briefing, he was shocked. I said, just read the info. 

Getting my thick skinned is a good thing in my opinion.

I see things less "absolutely" now. 

With all the changes in the CPF lately; there were plenty of calculation of impact. For me, I think it is a wonderful system, and the gate keepers have thus far doing more good than bad. But I refuse to calculate. 

Too many variables can be, and might be changed, and perhaps too frequently at the "whim and fancy" of gate keeper.

Although many changes are for the good than bad, but I prefer it as a sacred cow than a convenient tool.  

Look at the changes in contribution rate. It is not infrequent. Although the raises are more than the falls. So, am I very excited about the raise in income ceiling and 1% more interešt for those above 55? I am

Minimum sum calculation is still not clearly explained on how future adjustment will be. I am
Not against adjustment per se, but words like the rate of adjustment to take into account cost of living and STANDARD OF LIVING will not BE AT THE PACE OF RECENT years are just too vague. 

Then we have the DDA

When my time comes, can someone tell me what is the DDA?

When I can take 20% lump sum, I will take it. Unless I have so much outside the system that CPF is just a small supplement of my retirement plan, which I think on the contrary, I think CPF will form the bulk of my retirement fund, I want the stark in hand. You can calculate all the interešt I will be losing but I won't blink.

A bit out of point towards the end. But I just blog where my mind goes. I thick skinned, remember?


  1. Hi sillyinvestor,

    Happy CNY! Felt inspired to comment this time round lol. Yeah I sort of feel the same too, after a while you realize that you needn't be too particular about what other people think haha. I still read about the CPF changes but knowing that how things can change within 1/2/5 years there's no telling how it will morph by the time we reach 55 and beyond. Just treat it as something to watch and take notice but you won't know what you'll get until you reach it lol.

    Best wishes,

    1. Happy CNY Eugene,

      So happy that u came forward to leave a comment. Ya.. As long the mistake is not big enough to affect your job performance or keeping the job, chill la.

      Even with people, I also more chilled. Dun like me dun like me lor.

      I just be myself.

      Even if I moody, feeling demonic, it's still me. LOL, I can accept all of me, you can't too bad LOL

      Ya, watching it. So far, just hope the gate keeper continue to do a good job.

  2. Hi SI,

    I think I'm like that too. After being around for so long, it matters less what others think of me. If it's good praises, it'll soon pass. If it's bad comments, it'll soon pass. If they say nothing, it'll soon pass.

    1. LP,

      Do you notice there are some people whose words are "heavier" than others. Some people whatever they say, you just orr..

      Some even the silence is deafening.

      It is good that as we grow/ age things get lighter relatively

  3. Hi SI, I look at it the other way around i.e. not that we are more thick skin, but we are wearing less facade that hiding our true intention.

    I agreed with you that when the time come, I might take out the 20% too ;-)


    1. Hi Richard,

      I think the older we are, the more facade we wear with out friends. Its has been a long time since we have a heart to heart talk ....

  4. since young, i already very thick face:) hahahaha.

    SI, do you do yearly SA top up?

    influenced by AK:)

    1. HI Yeh,

      I do it more regularly during my earlier years. As the bulk of of OA is spent on mortage, my SA is actually much higher than my OA, so I am doing measured transfer.

      I will let my OA build up fasterin case i need it either for property or my son tertiary education. So I did top my with my connect plan payout last year. I do not think I will Do SA over the next few years though

  5. Hello SI,

    I am guessing the reason for you being thicker skinned may be :) age and nonchalance :)

    Age: as we get older we are more self assured, know what we want and who we are.

    Nonchalance: staying in a govt job, an "iron bowl" environment for a while, it makes me more indifferent to others' criticism.

    I am also teaching in a school. I also tend to speak my mind more and am uncaring about others' comments that I do not value. I do not really bother myself with people who don't matter to me (lousy teachers, those who want to climb at other's expense, self centered or power hungry etc) but spend my time interacting with people who genuinely care for the students and other colleagues. Even if it is the VP if I feel that he is just doing his job cos it is a job to him, he does not get my respect and I am indifferent to him.

    One of my life's principle when I encounter struggles is: always do what is right

    Just my 5c worth :)

  6. HI An9elfire,

    Nice to meet a fellow teacher here. If you don't mind, what subject do you teach? Primary or secondary?

    I like my job, but sometimes struggles to look if I am providing the best for that, especially the balance between a useful and meaningful activity or go for a highly efficient drill and practice.

    Pupils also know if we prepare ourselves for lesson, some are nice, some are "unforgiving" in their eyes, althought they are still polite.

    Yup, I have meet my fair share of VP that I really wonder how did she get to the post. As for bad colleagues, I have not meet those scary back stabbers yet. Please do not let me meet them, although energy sappers abound.

    Lets Jia you together. I am still in school marking... LOL

  7. Hello SI,
    My blog is

    You can read more of my adventures with the kids at the blog.

    I teach in a secondary school. I hardly mark :) but do lots of other stuff.

    Nowadays most of the activities I spend my time in school on are geared for the students. I always ask myself: is it worth doing? Will the kids benefit? If not I won't spend much time on it.

    Guess I am getting "thick skinned" too :)

    1. Hi An9elfire,

      I read your blog before! No wonder I find your nick familar. Hmm..

      Are you teaching PE?

      I got several mouths to feed, so I "man-whore" sometimes, I still want my performance bonus to be good LOL..

      See you around!